The Perils of Small Talk

It is, I believe, our human tendency to find ourselves hemmed in by small things – the finer details of church and politics, the infinitesimal flaws in relationships, the pull of insignificant materials and goods.  We in these moments find ourselves, of all people, most pitiable.  The smallest things in life suddenly are able to set us off.  And what do we so often do?  Ironically, we choose to only engage in small talk.  Let’s not talk about religion, education, politics, and philosophy.  Let’s instead talk about sports, the weather, movies, and events.  It is far safer on the shore where the boat can’t be rocked.

Here is a prescription to our malady:  See a few big things!

Go out west and see the Grand Canyon.  Head out east and see New York City.  Travel to California and see the Redwoods.  Drive to Colorado through the Rockies.  The pattern of common life is to drift among the small things – small worries, small pleasures, small ideas, and small talk.  It would be a very wise thing for us all to be exposed to some big things.

There are two human behaviors that often make me wonder.  One is, when I see middle aged people chasing after the possessions of this life, as if they will live on this earth forever.  The other is, when I see very intelligent and compulsive people becoming completely undone and distressed when they cannot master a task or solve a mystery.  I imagine at some point their tired and hungry hearts identify the need to return to the big and simple things.

But I do not want to forget another human behavior that has stirred my imagination at times.  In the past few months I have had the privilege of working with some lovely people who have given their lives to helping the poor and needy.  As they shared their vision and ministry, each talked much about a new birth, the work of God in their lives; they talked about how God had transformed them through His son Jesus Christ, and how His love has compelled them to comfort and support others.

These two behaviors stand in contrast to one another.  The soul of the poor coveter and the lonely thinker soon become weary of the mundane and long for the talk of the mission workers.  I’m not sure you can dwell on small things like money and on big things like souls at the same time.  Perhaps that is what led G.K. Chesterton to say, “Among the rich you will never find a really generous man even by accident.  They may give their money away, but they will never give themselves away; they are egotistic, secretive, dry as old bones.  To be smart enought to get all that money you must be dull enough to want it.”

I must admit there are times when I get so tired of the small things that I want to dive into the big things.  I so often forget about the passage of time and the greatness of eternity.  King David said, “For as man his days are like the grass, he flourishes like the flower of the field; but the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more.” (psalms 103:15,16)  The truth is that when it comes to small talk I have so very little to say.  My mind is more often filled with some great subject and I’d rather not deviate from it, but instead to find some person interested in entering into that subject.

When I was in Athens, Greece two years ago, I marvelled at the existence of the towering columns and arches of structures like the Parthenon.  At one point the city was being sacked and laid to ruins, and yet marvelously some things remained.  They remained because they were not easily destroyed, and those things were the big things.  You see, the big things remain in life.  “Now abides faith, hope, and love, and the greatest of these is love.”

We who are in ministry can learn much from this.  People, used to small things throughout their week, need to be presented on a Sunday morning with a prescription of big things.  Rather than taking out the stethoscope and the microscope, we need to gaze into the telescope.  Rather than being horizontal, we need to be vertical.  F.W. Boreham, perhaps my favorite author, has written, “A mulitude of grains of sand, however beautiful each separate grain may be in itself, only makes a desert after all; and there is no blinking the fact that deserts are not popular institutions.  People don’t like living in deserts; they like altitudes, magnitudes, infinitudes; they revel in the ruggedness of the ranges.”

The church should be the home of marvels, majesties, and immensities.  Why?  Because people can see the mountain peaks over the small things of their daily routines and temporal needs.  To be more precisely, we need to share with people and with one another the wonders of the Good News of Jesus.  “They shall cry out to the Lord, and He shall send them a Savior, and a great one.”  (Isaiah 19:20)  Everything about the work of Jesus is big.